The Duke of Sussex revealed he wanted to leave royal life in his 20s when he thought about how it would impact his future family.
“It’s the job right? Grin and bear it, get on with it,” Harry said of being trapped in his role. “When I was in my early 20s, I had a case of ‘I don’t want this job. I don’t want to be here, I don’t want to be doing this. Look what it did to my mom. How am I going to settle down and have a wife and a family when I know that it’s going to happen again?”
The prince told “Armchair Expert” co-hosts Dax Sheppard and Monica Padman that couldn’t see a way out of the Royal Firm when he was young.
“Because you can’t get out. How are you going to do this differently? How are you going to make your mom proud? How are you going to use this platform to really affect change and be able to give people that confidence to be able to change their own lives?” he said.
The Duke credits his wife Meghan Markle for helping him process his anger. “I’ve never screamed, I’ve never shouted. For me the best way to let out aggression is boxing,” he remarked. “But for me, prior to meeting Meghan, it was very much a case, certainly connected to the media, that anger and frustration of, ‘this is so unjust.’”
“She saw it. She saw it straight away,” he said about his wife. “She could tell that I was hurting and that some of the stuff that was out of my control was making me really angry. It would make my blood boil.”
After Princess Diana’s tragic paparazzi-induced death in 1997, Harry still grapples with the hold the media has over his family.
“The three major times that I felt helpless, one as a kid in the back of a car while my mom was being chased by paparazzi, two was in Afghanistan in an Apache helicopter and the third one was with my wife,” He recalled. “Those are the moments in my life where, yeah, feeling helpless hurts. It really hurts. And that’s when you think to yourself, ‘s—, I have the privilege, I have the platform, I have the influence and I even I can’t fix this. I can’t change this. And when you start getting in your head about it, that’s when it starts taking a toll.”